But Only If You want a Good Relationship

By Mary R. Dittman, M.B.A.

If you’re single and you’re over 40, you’ve probably been asked if (or told that) you’re too picky.

Like, you shouldn’t have any standards.  After all, you’re over 40 - you need to be more accepting because nobody’s perfect.

I find it interesting that when you go to the grocery store, you examine the produce because you don’t want to pick the tomatoes that are squished, or the apples that are bruised, or the lemons that are mildewy. 

But, God forbid that you have standards for a relationship!

I was dating a guy and learned that he had been divorced 4 times and had declared personal bankruptcy twice.  I told one of my friends I was going to dump him, and her response was that I was too focused on money.

OK - broke in your 20’s, starting out with nothing and building something together is romantic. 

Bankrupt in your 40’s with 4...

And How to Stop Obsessing About It

By Mary R. Dittman, M.B.A.

Have you even wondered why “he” chose “her”? 

This wondering may show up in two scenarios:

(a) you wonder why that man (guy you know, celebrity, athlete) chose the woman he’s with; or,

(b) you wonder why the man you wanted (or were with) chose someone else.

Let’s focus on Scenario B today: “your” guy chose her instead of you.

I was dating someone once, and right after we broke up, he started seeing someone who had a less-than-sterling reputation.

To the outsider, it’s clear that his interesting choice had nothing to do with me and everything to do with his own character.

But when you’re inside the scenario, it’s normal to wonder if there’s something wrong with you.

I think there are two issues here:

1. He doesn’t want to be with you
2. He does want to be with her

They may be correlated, but not causal.  That’s fancy...

Why I Broke Things Off - And Maybe You Should, Too

By Mary R. Dittman, M.B.A.

 How do you know when it’s time to end things?

How can you know if you’re doing the right thing? 

At the right time? 

What will the consequences be? 

When you’ve been with someone for years, you feel comfortable.  Even if the relationship doesn’t feel quite right, or isn’t what you really want.

I’ve ended a lot of relationships, but this one was tough. 

I broke up with my old website.  Sure, I took my domain name, but I left the old platform, website, and even 3 years worth of blog posts. 

It’s scary being out here all alone with my new site.  I’ve had to start over.  I can’t refer back to old articles. 

I know - you want to hear about leaving a REAL relationship.  I got you - my One-Derful tips will apply to your situation! 

1.  I was settling

I’ve always prided...